Monday, January 19, 2015

Dr. Martin and his DREAM: A Sorrowful True Confession


Dr. Martin. Today we reflect on your dream. Today I reflect on your dream personally. We take an entire day nationally to reflect and to consider the past and move forward toward a better day for all. My ramble today is a true confession. One that brings me shame to share. One that I am still processing. Perhaps typing will bring some sense to my reflection. 

What Progress has Transpired since your DREAM? 

There is a school in Dallas that proclaims your name.
Within those corridors is an amazing mural that reflects your vision.
Behold the power of art to capture history. 

While there I observed amazingly capable teachers delivering dynamic lessons. 

Progress indeed. 

If it were not for our New Year's brunch at Mulligan's, I would be ready to celebrate MLK day in actuality. Instead I sit here weeks later still shell-shocked. Never before in my adult life had I heard such a bigoted, racist comment. I nearly choked. How could I continue chewing my spinach and mushroom omelet? This sentiment expressed mid bite was so deplorable I will certainly not commit it to type here. In that moment, it was as though the air was sucked out of the room and time stopped. My mind reeled with the impact of what my ears had overheard.

It came so far out of left field I was unprepared. I couldn't have been much less surprised if a javelin had pierced my heart while reaching across the table for the salt. Our group of 18 civilized adults had pulled numerous tables together and I was facing the ocean with a view worthy to pause for a photo: that combo of the promise of sun, palms and umbrellas not yet open for business: pinch me. How is it even possible that this setting could be the backdrop for such an assault against humanity? 

We are new to this group gathered around the tables. Some of their friendships date back for decades. We are the outsiders. The interlopers. We are happy to be invited. 

Little did I realize. 
VERY LITTLE did I realize. 

With all of us packed around these gathered tables, someone would need to sit below the TV mounted in the corner from the ceiling. Our orders were arriving bit by bit and the television prattled on with no one in particular paying a bit of attention though it was suspended over our heads. 

Revisiting the year just closed via news clips.
You've seen those reviews every January first. 

And then it happened. 

This man I have only recently met, says something vile. 
Out loud. 
In public. 

I wish you could be proud of me.
Oh, how I wish you could be proud of my response. 
I wish that I could report that I had confronted him. 
I wish that I had spit out my omelet in his direction. 
But there I sat with a javelin through my heart, attempting to talk my ears out of having heard what he said.
I did nothing. I said nothing. I expressed nothing. 
I just sat there. In total disbelief. 

How is it possible that in the first eleven hours of 2015, there is a 'successful' adult person capable of dropping such a bomb mid eggs benedict? 
His sentiment made Archie Bunker look like the Nobel Prize winner.

Obviously I live a sheltered life.
I wear polka-dots and sing with children. 
Children eager to play with their peers, whether they are green or purple.
I honestly had NO idea that such a comment could be uttered.
I live a VERY sheltered life.  

I didn't realize that such virulent, horrific sentiment lives in some people's mouths. I didn't realize this individual was toxic. I didn't know that I was socializing with a barbarian. I have learned some time back that my political persuasion is in the minority here amid the palm trees. BUT Honest to goodness, I just had NO idea that people spoke this way of their fellow humans. 

What I know for sure.

Dr. King. I am sorry. 
I am so very, very sorry.
I honestly wouldn't have believed it had I not heard it with my own ears. 
I thought we had come further.
I thought that progress had been made. 
I thought we were headed closer and closer to a better day.  
I promise I will be a better advocate moving forward. 

I am likely to see this individual again.
I will know of what he is made. 
I will have had time and preparation, reflection and pondering before he opens his mouth again in my presence.
I have replayed this scene a hundred times with various conclusions.  
At the very least, next time I can projectile vomit my meal in his direction, rather than choking it back.  

How far have we come? 
It all depends on who you spend your time with. 

The children are our future. 
Teach them well, my friends, teach them well. 

I am here to tell you that there are grandparents in this great country of ours that were NOT taught well during their childhood. What an absolute crime that over the course of an entire life they have not educated themselves in the manners of human rights, civility and decency. 

My shock is wearing off and my disbelief and anger are increased.

#BeBRAVE 
#BeBRAVE Debbie Clement #BeBRAVE

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